Suicide
by MeteorXShowerXx
Summary: This is a one-shot of a girl, warning: you might cry or might think wrong about this.
1. Chapter 1

Alana's Pov

I sighed looking up at the clock as it read 6:30; my Mom had called to say she wasn't coming home tonight. My Dad was in California for business; my Dog was snoring in deep sleep in the computer room. I remember the last time I spoke to my parents and they didn't even say I love you. I had come home from school not too long ago; I was in detention for drawing on desks. Tomorrow will be especially hard because I'm starting advanced math, I don't even know HOW I got into there. I felt hot streams of water roll down my cheeks, my family barely talks to each other, and my sister was on drugs and being raped by her boyfriend. My own dog doesn't like me; she always tries to bite me. Sometimes my sister takes her anger out on me; she threatens to kill me and to hurt me. I blinked my eyes hard and my eyes traveled to the knives in the kitchen and I walked over to myself and picked up a large one. I cried out the sobs of pain as I glided the knife across my skin. I watched as blood dripped down my skin as I rushed to the sink to wash it away. The mark remanded there reminding me of the pain I go through.

"Secrets," I repeated told myself that night. I had made myself macaroni and cheese for dinner and served my dog her dinner before she ate me. I quickly finished up my homework and I headed to bed alone.

*Next Day; Advanced Math*

I kept my arms from showing all the cuts all day, so far it was worked. I sat next to a boy who was in my study hall last year. Every few minutes he would try to look at my arms and I would move over. I was almost out of my seat; I decided to go to the bathroom for the rest of the period so I could avoid him. I was almost in the bathroom when I felt someone yank me back.

"Why do you hide your arms from me?" He asked me holding my shoulders, I held my hands behind my back and winced in pain when I felt the scars brush up against my clothing.

"No reason, now just, leave me alone," I sighed trying to escape his grip, but he ripped my arms out and starred at my cuts.

"You-you cut yourself?" He asked softly I got my arms free and ran out the doors, but he followed, what a stalker.

"No, I fell off my bike while riding it," I lied running away to my house. I always had my keys with me and opened the door. My dog began to bark so I ran to my room; I got on the roof and began to cry.

"Lying gets you nowhere," The boy told me from my window, I decided not to turn around, but he made me when he was next to me.

"Why do you care? You don't even know me," I truthfully told him starring at his face; it was shocked from all the information I just got.

"Because I love you," He admitted to my face, I stopped crying at the moment and he hugged me, "just stop," He whispered into my ear, I nodded slowly.

*Month Later*

My parents divorced and my sister died from consuming drugs, today. The boy's name was John; he was my boyfriend and was currently holding me in his arms saying that it will be ok. John was the best thing to happen to me. When he held me, it felt like someone cared about me. After an hour he left, I smiled to myself. In the past month I had my first kiss. I was different, I wasn't just Alana, I was loving Alana. Now it is 7:00 P.M. at night and I sit on my roof watching the stars when my phone lite up with a picture. It was a picture of John making out with another girl. My heart shattered. I immediately texted him saying that we were done and goodbye…forever. I texted in my last facebook status; Goodbye my lover, goodbye my life. Goodbye world, because tonight I will be with Jesus in heaven, dead, joining my sister and grandmom. When I finished I jumped off my roof and blacked out. I woke up in John's bedroom; he hit his head on the backboard and realized to run to my house. I was following him when he saw me on the ground and caught my phone as it slid down my roof.

"Wow, this was photo shopped and now, she is dead," He cried into his hands and called 9-1-1. The ambulance arrived quickly to only tell him I was dead. I wanted to run to him and kiss him, but now because of my own mistake, I couldn't.


	2. Epilogue

John's Pov

Having a crush on a girl is like saying I love her. With the quiet girl who sat in the back of the room, it was having a crush. I tried my best all year to make her laugh, but she would act like she didn't even hear me. She had black hair, it was straight and silky. In the lightning of the room it would shine, when she wasn't looking I would stare at her rare beauty. Her eyes were greenish blue, they always had sadness hidden in them, but I didn't know why. When Advanced Math started this year, she was in there, right next to me. I always noticed that she wore long sleeves. I tried to get a peek at her skin, but she kept moving away. As soon as I know it, she was out of the room. The teacher fell asleep so I decided to get out and to secretly talk to her, but in the end I ended up on her roof telling her I loved her. I don't regret ever doing that. Every girl liked me, when I say every, I mean every. I guess it was because of my always tan skin, dark hair, chestnut eyes, abs, and my freckles. I can't help having god damn good looks. Every girl, tried to destroy us they usually failed, up until now.

I use to tell her I would fix her, help her to get through every mistake, every little thing that made her cry. When I found her dead, it was worse than losing my own life. She _was _my life, like I use to tell her we are soulmates. Love maybe defined in a dictionary, but our love was something no one could say ever happened before. This night was the worst night of my life; I sit here looking out my window watching the stars attempt to cheer me up. I knew that if I was either going to die happy to see her again, or to die being sad that I moved on to a woman I was never happy to be with. I like the first choice, now I'm making it happen. I blinked trying to think of what to do, when I saw an angel.

"John, don't," The angel spoke to me in the light and came closer and I realized it was _**my**_ angel.

"I-I can't be happy without you," I told her with tears in my eyes, I stood up staring into her eyes, the light gave them a twinkle and it was like I was dreaming.

"You think that now, there are other people out there for you. I made a mistake that cost my life, don't make the same one, move on to a woman who wants you, who needs me," She admitted to my face making me look down in sadness.

"But you want me, you need me," I spoke thinking it was the truth, she looked away then back.

"That was when I was alive, when I needed to be fixed. I'm dead now, I've been fixed. When you die, I'll be in heaven and I'll see you. All boys and girls never forget their first love, but it doesn't mean it is their only," She truthfully told me as she sat down beside me on my bed.

"I'll try," I told her looking down. When she followed my gaze I kissed her. Her lips tasted like nothing, but I will say it was the best one. She pulled away smiled and blushed, but then she faded away. I fell back onto my bed.

Now, I'm 78 still unmarried. I never found someone as good as her, I dated others, but I still was never happy. Right now, I'm sitting in a room at a nursing home. I had a view of the beach from this room. She adored the beach, I cried under my thick glasses. I used to tell my nieces and nephews about this story and they would jump up and down and say, "Uncle John, tell us the truth! That is amazing!" And they would sit there in shock. I would chuckle to myself; tonight I felt like was my last night of life. That night I passed away in my sleep, when I reached heaven I looked 13 again and ran to Alana. I kissed her and smiled like I never smiled before. That my friend, is how you know true love or what you call, love at first sight.


End file.
